FYI: fifteen months

if i'm alone, no one questions the bump. if the boys are
around, all bets are off. 

lately people seem to be obsessed with the ages of my sons. Gavin's especially. several strangers have asked me, in recent weeks, "how old is your little guy there?" (well, some of them think he's a girl—baffling to me, but perhaps the blond curls throw them.) when i answer, they immediately ask, "when are you due?" and then i see where they're going. and then we have to have that conversation.

i'm thinking of printing up a pamphlet i can just hand out the last eight weeks of this pregnancy. to hear it from these strangers, i have very little time left before i completely lose my mind, so i might as well conserve as many precious minutes of sanity as i can.

Dear Well-Meaning Random Person,

Yes, I am indeed quite pregnant with my third child. And yes, that little blond boy (trust me, he's all boy) sitting in that shopping cart is also mine, and he's also newly one. Let me do the math for you—he and his little sister will be 15 months apart. Which, according to Google, does not make them Irish twins, but that's such a quaint term, isn't it? So let's just pretend they will be Irish twins. And assume I'll start adding Bailey's Irish to my coffee every morning very soon...

Oh, and yes, to answer the other question dangling on the tip of your tongue—my husband and I do know how babies are made. No, really, we do. But somehow the universe thought it would be funny to put the two of us in a hotel room sans existing kids (our first alone time in six months) and mess with my ovulation date simultaneously. I won't tell you what my reaction was when I saw, six weeks later, those two lines on the EPT—I don't even know you, cursing would be impolite. Just trust me this wasn't in our plan.

But she's our little girl now. We can't wait to meet her and we wouldn't change a thing. (Well, I would change these crazy veins popping everywhere, but I'm trying to be less vain—have to practice being a strong, secure and confident example of a woman.) Yes, I see that expression on your face—we know our lives will be total and utter chaos for the next however many years, but if anyone can handle it, and keep laughing through it, I'm pretty sure it's us. I'm praying it's us. I'm going to ensure it's us.

Thanks so much for your peculiar interest in my life. Now, unless you have any other burning questions, I really need to pee.

you think that would do the trick?

mbm